Simple Steps to Find Your Ikigai

“Our ikigai is different for all of us, but one thing we have in common is that we are all searching for meaning.” — Hector Garcia.

We’re never too young to search for meaning and purpose and never too old to change our plans because we’ve found meaning and purpose.

What really matters is that we find our Ikigai (purpose and meaning) and live it!

Stop and ask yourself this simple question- what are you chasing?

Job, money, titles? Status, stuff, experiences, or excitement? Whatever it is, does it align with your purpose in life, or is your life nothing more than the pursuit of things?

The problem with life is that we chase things rather than live; these become our circumstances. Over time, we become our circumstances; what we do is who we are.

Sadly, for most of us, what we do is a function of circumstance, tradition, or necessity, not purpose.

This is further complicated as we become increasingly more comfortable and satisfied with our circumstances.

We feel satisfied and successful until something threatens us or wakes us up, and we suddenly get really serious about things like family, meaning, and purpose.

For me, that happened in 2011 when I was diagnosed with stage four head and neck cancer. My life would never be the same. Cancer was a harsh wake-up call, and my reaction was to change everything.

Cancer made me rethink everything about my life. My first priority was to beat cancer, followed by never being this sick again. So I changed.

I was in survivor mode. I lost 85 pounds, stopped drinking alcohol and eating meat, and began running- again.

I changed everything except my job. My vocation remained the same, and it would take me twelve more years to realize that I needed to change that, too. So, I set out to find meaning and purpose- to find my Ikigai.

It wasn’t easy, but it was totally worth it. Today, I am on a different path: happier, more relaxed, less depressed and angry—broke but happy.

Wherever you are in life, you can change your circumstances, your life, and your trajectory.

Here are the steps I followed; they can work for you, too: Look back and reflect on your past self. What did you do that gave you joy and happiness? What were your dreams, interests, and passions? Who were you, and how did you define yourself?

Look forward and imagine your future self, then identify the activities you see yourself doing that you are passionate about and that give you joy and true fulfillment.

Now, list your favorite past and future activities that you are good at or really good at, and know that you can become or are an expert at.

Now, highlight the things that you are good at and love doing. This is your sweet spot. The only question remains: Does the world need these, and will people pay for them?

Your Ikigai is what you are good at, love doing, the world needs, and people will pay for!

Would doing “this” make you happy? Can you support yourself, or is this a framework for developing your career?

For example, my Ikigai is- To help people solve problems, achieve their goals, and get Sh*t done.

This is not a job but rather a framework. It’s like a litmus test I use to see if I should do something or pass on it.

To illustrate, I spent thirty years in management. I’m not fond of management, but I love helping people grow and develop their skills. I have a business background/education and abundant expertise, but I lack the attention to detail and patience to be good at it. However, I love to advise people and help them grow their businesses. So, I stopped looking for a job and started consulting and mentoring.

I was an artist in the past, and creating things made me happy. So, I began writing. Today, I no longer paint with oils or acrylics; I use words.

I was not great at managing, but I was good at coaching, mentoring, and advising. I was not fond of business, but I have expertise, so this is my area of focus. I am creative and express myself through prose.

If COVID has taught us anything, it’s taught us that we have choices. Our lives don’t need to be dictated by tradition, and what we thought brought us happiness and fulfillment may not.

We learned that work could be done anywhere and that we can integrate our work and home lives, but with boundaries, to find balance.

But most of all, we gained confidence—confidence to challenge the status quo, confidence to ask why, and confidence to change everything.

My generation made it our mission to challenge the status quo, question authority, and live authentically. Many of us lost that along the way.

I don’t want that to happen to you! So, the next step is up to you. All I want for you is happiness, so find it and live your best life!